A Hard Lesson

As you probably could have guessed, the results of last night's election left me feeling sad and scared. It was something that I genuinely feared, but at the same time, didn't think would happen.

Throughout the day, I have pondered how I wanted to go about writing this. At first, I wanted to spew all my anger and fear and disgust that overwhelmed me at the beginning of this day. I thought better of that because I have realized that such a display would not help me or you. Instead, I am forced into a new mindset. I don't think I can sit back and believe that I live in the greatest country in the world when the examples of 58 million people have taught me otherwise. I fail to see how this country, consumed with fear, bigotry and intolerance for its own people is better than England, Spain, Sweden and France. Is it because we make more money? Is that how we measure greatness? Is it that we have the greatest capacity and resources to do good? That may be if we used those resources for good? Is it our freedoms? I am willing to sacrifice some of those if it means that children can have healthcare and the elderly can have their medications from Canada. Clearly, I am in the minority when it comes to the willingness for those sacrifices. I hear that morals and values are what won this election. What moral and values? What's moral about a war that the majority sees as a mistake? What's moral about taking away one's Constitutional rights because of whom they love? Honestly, it makes me sick. It makes me sick that "bleeding heart" has a negative connotation. Is it so wrong to think of those suffering before you think of yourself? Obviously, it is.

Once the sadness, confussion and overwhelming disappointed in this country subsided, I decided to create my own "silver lining". I realized that, although the majority of this county doesn't see the suffering of people as a top five concern, doesn't mean I can't make it a priority in my life. Already I have weighed the possibilities of joining the Peace Corps because, I began to realize that there is an entire world out there that I know nothing about. That would be a though choice because it is a two year commitment and I can't miss two years of my families lives. I know, I too have selfish things to get over but I assume family is a better value than assault weapons. Instead, I will strive to become active in the lives of the less fortunate in the communities around me and maybe one day, I will have the resources to expand my effort across the country's borders. I know what you are thinking: "Steve is a hippie, tree-hugger." That's out of the way, so now think about it. I want to dedicate some of my time to benefit the lives of others less fortunate. I think if people would stop to think, they'd get passed the negative stereotypes. If anyone can tell me why a bleeding heart is bad, feel free to comment.

I know it's hard to get a true idea of my state of mind right now because you only get to read my thoughts. I assure you that I am the same old Steve. Now, however, I need to express my values through my actions, not only my words.

Note: After reading this, I know it can be hard to follow but that may be because I had no set format in my mind before I began writing. The words just began to flow, straight from my bleeding heart.

~SaG